How to think like a man catcher

by E. Jean Carroll
(taken from her book Mr. Right, Right Now)

1. You live a life of purpose and your purpose is not about men.

2. You do not adopt anybody else's way of doing things, but find your own way - including following / not following any so-called seven "deep and essential truths".

3. You do not give a big flying fart blossom what men think.

4. Whether men love you or hate you, you trully dont care (okay, okay, you do care, but you dont desperately care).

5. You do not fritter away your life worrying about the male beast and what he is "doing".

6. You know that it is completely useless to take men seriously.

7. This attitude causes men to froth at the mouth like rabid shrinks.

My commandments

based from Robert Fulghum's Recommendation of the 10th commandments.
(the 10th and maybe 11th will just follow....)

1. Buy peanuts or balot from any kid who is selling.
2. Anytime you can vote on anything, vote.
3. Attend the fifth, tenth,... twenty-fifth reunion of your high school class.
4. Choose having time over having money.
5. Always take the scenic route.
6. Give at least something to any beggar who ask (except if he is physically able than you).
7. Give money to all street musicians and give candies to children who are asking for money.
8. Always be someone's valentine.
9. When the concert comes to town, be there. ( for as long as affordable ang ticket)

soup 1: It was on fire!

would you dare to lay on a bed of fire?

only stupid and needy people do... but for the sane ones... i dont think they will ever do that dare ( except for a price). I have read Robert Fulghum's book "It was on fire when i lay down on it". He didnt really laid on the bed of fire but the book seems like a fire that laying on it would not be harmful and would be beneficial. Points to Ponder!As a proof, i quoted some lines from the book.

1. I cannot understand my own behavior. I fail to carry out the things I want to do and I find myself doing the very things i hate.
-> statement by Saint Paul

2. I know what evil I am about to do. My irrational self is stronger than my resolution.
-> words from Euripides

3. Falling is not so bad. It's a little like flying, but you dont have to flap your arms.
It's hitting the ground that is teh hassle. So try not to hit the ground

4. To ponder is not to brood or grieve or even meditate.
It is to wonder at a deep level.

5. One must believe that anything can happen.

6. In life, what counts is not what I do, but how I think about myself while I'm doing it.

7. A willingness to do your share of cleaning up the mess is a test.
And taking out the garbage of this life is a condition of membership in the community.

8. Being an adult is a dirty work.
But someone has to do it.

9. Doing good involves a kind of grimness.
To assaul evil, even small evil, with mischeif, cleverness, merritment, and laugther - that takes
genuis few of us have but which, when it is found, graces the human scene and makes progress both possible and palatable.

10. No matter what you do, it's probably not going to work out very well anyhow.

How to get your pigs pregnant

A man has a farm and he wants to find a way to
get his pigs pregnant so he goes to a vet. The
vet tells him," To get them pregnant you have to
fuck them all up the ass. The way to see if
they're pregnant is that if they roll in the mud,
they're not, and if they roll in the grass,
they're pregnant."

The guy loads the pigs into his truck and fucks
them up the ass. Next day he wakes up and says to
his wife," Hey honey, what are the pigs doing?"

The wife says," Oh they're rolling in the mud."

He gets really pissed and finds out from the vet
he has to fuck them twice as hard, so again he
loads the pigs into the truck and fucks them
again. Next morning he wakes up and says,"
Hey honey, are the pigs rolling on the mud?"

The wife says," No they're not."

The man is really happy and says," Really? Well
then what are they doing?"

The wife says," They're waiting for you in the
truck."